20岁,光阴不再来
When I was in my 20s, I saw my very first psychotherapy
client. I was a Ph.D. student in clinical psychology at Berkeley. She was a 26-year-old woman named Alex.Now Alex walked into her first session wearing jeans and a big slouchy top, and she dropped onto the couch in my office and kicked off her flats and told me she was there to talk about guy problems. Now when I heard this, I was so relieved. My classmate got an arsonist for her first client.
当我20⼏岁时， 我见到了我的第⼀个需要精神疗法的病⼈。 当时我是⼀个在伯克利⼤学 读临床⼼理学的Ph.D学⽣。 她是⼀位叫Alex的26岁⼥性。 第⼀次会⾯时Alex穿了 ⽜仔裤以及略微不修边幅的上⾐， 进来后直接坐到我办公室中的沙发上， 踢掉她的鞋⼦， 然后跟我说她是来跟我讲男性问题的。 当我听到这个时，我松了⼀⼜⽓。 我的⼀个同学的第⼀个病⼈是⼀个纵⽕犯。 And I got a twentysomething who wanted to talk about boys. This I thought I could handle. But I didn't handle it. With the funny stories that Alex would bring to session, it was easy for me just to nod my head while we kicked the can down the road.
"Thirty's the new 20," Alex would say, and as far as I could tell, she was right. Work happened later, marriage happened later, kids happened later, even death happened later.
Twentysomethings like Alex and I had nothing but time.
所以说，我有⼀个⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈ 想跟我谈谈男⽣。 我以为我能处理好这事。但我没能办到。 Alex在每⼀次会⾯时 都会带来好笑的故事， 因此对我⽽⾔点点头， 不断拖延出结果的时间是⼀件⾮常轻松的事情。 Alex会说“三⼗就是新的⼆⼗”， ⽽且就我知道的，她是对的。 ⼯作要以后才有，结婚以后才有， 孩⼦以后才有，连死亡都是以后才有。 像Alex和我⼀样是⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈除了时间外⼀⽆所有。
TED 20岁，光阴不再来
题⽬：Why 30 is not the new 20
作者：Meg Jay
psychotherapy n.⼼理疗法client n.客户clinical adj.诊所的session n.会话slouchy adj.懒散的arsonist n.纵⽕犯
twentysomet hing ⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈
marriage n.结婚
But before long, my supervisor pushed me to push Alex about her love life. I pushed back. I said, "Sure, she's dating down, she's sleeping with a knucklehead, but it's not like she's going to marry the
guy." And then my supervisor said, "Not yet, but she might marry the next one. Besides, the best time to work on Alex's marriage is before she has one."
但没过多久，我的监督就催我 开始推动Alex的爱情⽣活。 我拒绝了。
我说：“没错，她现在在约会， 她和⼀个笨蛋同床， 但这并不表⽰她会和他结婚。”然后我的监督说： “现在还没，但她可能会和下⼀个这
样的⼈结婚。 再说，在Alex的婚事上花费精⼒的最好时间 就是在她结婚之前。”
That's what psychologists call an "Aha!" moment. That was the moment I realized, 30 is not the new 20. Yes, people settle down later than they used to, but that didn't make Alex's 20s a developmental downtime. That made Alex's 20s a developmental sweet spot, and we were sitting there, blowing it. That was when I realized that this sort of benign neglect was a real problem, and it had real consequences, not just for Alex and her love life but for the careers and the families and the futures of twentysomethings everywhere.
这就是⼼理学家们所说的“原来如此！”瞬间。 在那⼀瞬间，我明⽩了
三⼗岁并不是新的⼆⼗岁。 没错，⼈们⽐以前更晚安顿下来， 但这并不说明Alex的⼆⼗⼏岁这个时间
段是她的发展低⾕。 这使Alex的⼆⼗
⼏岁⼀个发展的良好时期， ⽽我们就坐在那⼉荒废它。 这时我才明⽩这种“善意的疏忽” 是⼀个⾮常现实的问题，⽽且它有严重的后果， 不仅是对于Alex和她的爱情⽣活 也对于各地的⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈的 家庭与未来。
There are 50 million twentysomethings in the United States right now. We're talking about 15 percent of the population, or 100 percent if you consider that no one's getting through adulthood without going through their 20s first.
现在美国有⼤约5千万⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈。 这⼤概是总⼈⼜的15%，或者说
100%如果你考虑到 没⼈能在不经历⼆⼗⼏岁这个阶段的情况下经过成⼈期。supervisor n.监督者push back 拒绝knucklehead n.蠢⼈
settle down 安顿下来
developmental downtime
发展低⾕sweet spot 良好时期neglect
v.疏于照顾
adulthood n.成⼈期
Raise your hand if you're in your 20s. I really want to see some
twentysomethings here. Oh, yay! You are all awesome. If you
work with twentysomethings, you love a twentysomething,
you're losing sleep over twentysomethings, I want to see —
Okay. Awesome, twentysomethings really matter.
如果你是⼆⼗⼏岁的话举⼀下⼿。 我⾮常想在这⼉看到⼀些⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈。 太好了！你们都棒极了。 如果你和⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈⼯作，如果你爱⼀个⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈， 如果你因为⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈⽽失眠，我就想看到— 好的。棒极了，⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈⾮常重要。
So, I specialize in twentysomethings because I believe that
every single one of those 50 million twentysomethings deserves
to know what psychologists, sociologists, neurologists and
fertility specialists already know: that claiming your 20s is one
of the simplest, yet most transformative, things you can do for
work, for love, for your happiness, maybe even for the world.
我专门研究⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈，因为我相信 这5千万个⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈中每⼀个 都应该知道每⼀个⼼理学家， 社会学家，神经学家以及⽣育专家 都知道的： 那就是把握你的⼆⼗岁这⼀个阶段是最简单的， 但又是最有影响⼒的你能为 你的职业，爱情，幸福， 甚⾄是全世界做的事。This is not my opinion. These are the facts. We know that 80
percent of life's most defining moments take place by age 35.
That means that eight out of 10 of the decisions and experiences
and "Aha!" moments that make your life what it is will have
happened by your mid-30s.People who are over 40, don't panic.
This crowd is going to be fine, I think. We
这不是我的观点。这是事实。 我们知道⼀个⼈的⼀⽣中的80%的最重要的时刻 发⽣在35岁。 这就意味着每10个 决定你的⽣命会是什么样的 的经历与“原来如此！”时刻 中有8个发⽣在三⼗岁中旬。超过40岁的⼈，别慌。 我估计这个观众没问题。 awesome adj.让⼈惊叹的
specialize vi.专⻔研究
psychologist n.⼼理学家neurologists n.神经学家fertility
n.⽣育
transformative adj.有改⾰能⼒的
We know that the first 10 years of a career has an exponential impact on how much money you're going to earn. We know that more than half of Americans are married or are living with or dating their future partner by 30. We know that the brain caps off its second and last growth spurt in your 20s as it rewires itself for adulthood, which means that whatever it is you want to change about yourself, now is the time to change it. We know that personality changes more during your 20s than at any other time in life, and we know that female fertility peaks at age 28, and things get tricky after age 35.
So your 20s are the time to educate yourself about your body and your options.
我们知道⼀份职业中的前10年 对于你将会挣多少钱 有⾮常⼤的影响。 我们知道超过⼀半的美国⼈ 30岁之前就和终⽣伴侣结婚， 同居，或者在约会。 我们知道⼤脑在你⼆⼗⼏岁时 为了适应成⼈期 达到第⼆次也是最后⼀次成长期的⾼峰， 这说明⽆论你想改变你⾃⼰的什么， 现在就是改变它的时间。 我们知道相⽐⼈⽣其他阶段 ⼆⼗岁时的个性变化最⼤， ⽽且我们也知道⼥性的繁殖能⼒在28岁时达到峰顶， 到35岁之后事情就有点难办了。 因此你的⼆⼗⼏岁这个时间段就是 告诉⾃⼰⾃⼰的⾝体状况以及未来的选择的时候。
So when we think about child development, we all know that the first five years are a critical period for language and attachment in the brain. It's a time when your ordinary, day-to-day life has an inordinate impact on who you will become. But what we hear less about is that there's such a thing as adult development, and our 20s are that critical period of adult development.
因此当我们说到⼉童发展， 我们都知道前5年是⼤脑发展 语⾔和爱慕的关键时期。 这是⼀个你的每⽇⽣活都会对你的未来 产⽣巨⼤影响的时间段。 但是我们听到的⽐较少的就是有⼀个东西叫 成⼈发展，⽽我们的⼆⼗岁这个阶段 就是成⼈发展的关键时期。partner
n.搭档personality n.个性tricky adj.狡猾的
critical period 关键时期
attachment n.爱慕
But this isn't what twentysomethings are hearing. Newspapers talk about the changing timetable of adulthood. Researchers call the 20s an extended adolescence. Journalists coin silly nicknames for twentysomethings like "twixters" and "kidults."As a culture, we have trivialized what is actually the defining decade of adulthood.
二十大开始时间
但这并不是⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈所听到的。 报纸在描述成⼈的时间表的变更， 研究⼈员把⼆⼗⼏岁叫做延长的青春期。 新闻记者在给⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈附加愚蠢的外号， ⽐如“中间者”和“成年⼉童”。 这是真的。 作为⼀种⽂化，我们把实际上是成⼈期中最重要的⼀个⼗年 列为不重要的东西。
Leonard Bernstein said that to achieve great things, you need a plan and not quite enough time.Isn't that true?So what do you think happens when you pat a twentysomething on the
head and you say, "You have 10 extra years to start your life"? Nothing happens. You have robbed that person of his urgency and ambition, and absolutely nothing happens.
伦纳德伯恩斯坦说过如果想办成⼤事， 就需要⼀个计划和不⾜够的
时间。 这不对吗？ 所以说当你 拍⼀个⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈的头然后说：“你还有额外的⼗年才开始⽣活”时你认为会发⽣什么？ 什么也不会
发⽣。 你剥夺了那个⼈的紧迫感以及志向， 但是什么都没发⽣。And then every day, smart, interesting twentysomethings like you or like your sons and daughters come into my office and say things like this: "I know my boyfriend's no good for me, but this relationship doesn't count. I'm just killing time." Or they say, "Everybody says as long as I get started on a career by the time I'm 30, I'll be fine."
然后每天就有像你们的⼉⼦或者⼥⼉⼀样 既聪明又有趣的⼆⼗⼏岁
的⼈ 跑到我的办公室跟我说 “我知道我的男朋友对我⼀点好处都没有， 但这段感情不算数。我只是在消耗时间。” 或者是“⼤家都说只
要我在30岁之前 开始我的职业就没问题。”这⼀类的话。rob
v.剥夺timetable
n.时间表adolescence n.⻘春期silly
adj.愚蠢的nicknames n.外号
But then it starts to sound like this: "My 20s are almost over, and I have nothing to show for myself. I had a better résumé the day after I graduated from college." And then it starts to sound like this: "Dating in my 20s was like musical chairs. Everybody was running around and having fun, but then sometime around 30 it was like the music turned off and everybody started sitting down. I didn't want to be the only one left standing up, so sometimes I think I married my husband because he was the closest chair to me at 30."
但后来他们就开始讲： “我的⼆⼗岁快结束了，但我没什么可以展现的。 我毕业那天最好写写⾃⼰的简历。”之后他们开始讲： “⼆⼗⼏岁时的约会就像玩抢座位游戏。 ⼤家跑来跑去，乐在其中， 但到30岁左右⾳乐就停掉了， ⼤家⼀个接⼀个开始坐下。 我不想成为唯⼀⼀个站着的⼈， 因此有时候我觉得我和我丈夫结婚的原因 就是因为在我30岁时他是距我最近的‘椅⼦’。”
Where are the twentysomethings here? Do not do that.Okay, now that sounds a little flip, but make no mistake, the stakes are very high. When a lot has been pushed to your 30s, there is enormous thirtysomething pressure to jump-start a career, pick a city, partner up, and have two or three kids in a much shorter period of time. Many of these things are incompatible, and as research is just starting to show, simply harder and more stressful to do all at once in our 30s.
这⾥的⼆⼗⼏岁的⼈在哪⼉？ 别做这种事。好吧，刚才那听起来可能有⼀点轻浮，但是别搞错， 在这⾥筹码⾮常⾼。 当很多事情被推
到三⼗⼏岁再做时， 在你的三⼗岁这个阶段就有在极短的时间内开始⼀个职业，挑选⼀个城市，到⼀个伴侣 并且⽣⼏个孩⼦的巨⼤
压⼒。 这些事情中有很多是不兼容的， ⽽且就如研究开始表明， 在三⼗⼏岁这个阶段同时完成这么多事 的压⼒以及难度实在是太⼤了。flip
v.轻浮enormous adj.巨⼤的incompatible n.不相容的

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